People, sometimes

i got an unfinished draft of this meme thing courtesy of Fcb saved but before thats delivered lemme share this wit ya.

so me and will are hanging on the steps outside the palace late this evening or early this morning, whatever you want to call it, all hopped up on dialog, enjoying the night. he's explaining to me that the native americans call each other indian but dont like when other, non-native americans refer to them as such. he knows this because the last girlfriend he had was native american and lived on a reservation and schooled him on the NA ways. they dont prefer to be called indian by anyone other than another indian, unless the person is from india i guess, then they would have to call them native american, or so this is how it seems. he says -its like homosexuals calling each other queers or blacks calling each other niggers.

of course i have to rail on him for that one. he knew he fucked up once he said it, regretted the sounds before they left his mouth. i howl at him my frustration that people actually imply that blacks are MISPRONOUNCING the word nigger. that we are that stupid. its absolutely insulting. OF COURSE we know how to pronounce the word nigger, we just refuse to ever do it, as should everyone else. -you think if a black guy went up to another black guy and said "whats up my nigger?" shit would go down smoothly? hell muthafuckin naw! i would have cut his ass if i didnt know he was just trying to sound scholarly and over-enunciate everything like a fuckin jackass. he gave me the -alright alright whatever, and we moved along.

this happens every now and then, will reminds me he is white and i remind him i am black and then we go on as we are supposed to.

then my downstairs neighbor comes home, drowned in alcohol, fresh from a bachelorette party, stumbling toward the stoop, blond hair in full drunken sway. ive only seen this chick three other times since shes live here so its not like we have any catching up to do. we say hi to each other and im polite and shes polite and were matching each other grin for grin. then the liquor gets loose and she starts getting chatty. its gravy, ive been there, so i just listen. eventually she goes into how she saw my mom [the white one] a few times when she was here. she mentions how my mom was coming into the building and was right behind her as she opened the door. my mom had keys but my neighbor didnt know and still, she let her in anyway, because she said she was my mom.

im following her slur and fine with it until she mentions how she probably wouldnt have done that to a black woman and feels conflicted about it because she just saw the movie Crash and "it doesnt really matter what race anyone is but i realize i wouldnt have just let a black person in like i did your mother and thats just weird," and i stop grinning and wait. i wait because i know she is going to leave if i sit still and expect her to explain what she means. i wait and then she mentions how the dominican contractors that fixed her bathroom ceiling creeped her out. i wait some more and she says she didnt know if she could trust the dominicans that were in her apartment, hired to fix her ceiling, and she would hide her ipod before she left even though our landlord would be there the whole time and it was only one guy that was about 50 and never left her bathroom. i wait until she stutters that she has to leave and grabs her purse and walks up the stairs, wishing me a good night.

will is the first one to speak after she leaves. -damn, i saw that guy shes talking about. fool was about 85 years old. probably wouldnt even know how to work an ipod. that chick was a colonizer. he likes to call racist colonizers. he thinks its clever. i guess it kind of is.

-yeah, i say, still, i hid my PSP when he was in my bathroom.

-right. he answers, then burning his finger while re-lighting the joint, drops the matches and sucks at his wound.