prospects

it isnt that im an unsavory person, though i do admit to having the capacity for depraved or lecherous desires. (i am, if nothing else, a human fully aware of his appetites.) and i reject the notion that am any more lowly or sleazy than the next man. but i have to say, im sorely disappointed with the quality of women in this semesters selection of classes. i dont ask for much, and i never intend to hit on my classmates, but its always nice to look forward to a pretty face when challenged with three and a half hours of lecture.

in my film class there is the Spanish girl with thick thighs and dirty blind hair who has full lips and blue eyes but has that needy demeanor im only turned on by when drunk. in my women in history course there is the dark brown girl who dyes her hair blond and clearly takes a hot comb to it, with big tits and a nice smile and an eager attitude that screams overachiever. and in my Spanish course there is no one. at best the middle ages mother of two with the pin up girl hair-do and a seemingly endless wardrobe of damsel in distress dresses.

other than that there is a smattering of men still clinging onto their rebellious hair length, who sport goatees and loose, casual shirts that hide their advancing girth and show off their indifferent fashion sense. there is Phyllis, the almost sickly thin black woman with the wide, desperate smile and salt and pepper hair. there is carol, who looks like shes paying her way through college with the money she makes in truck stop bathrooms. there is Agnes, who is the kind of women you know looks good in her old pictures but these days resembles just what she is, a grandmother three times over. and of course we cant forget Sylvia, who comes to class straight from the office, hands probably still cramped from all the calls she spent her day forwarding.

and then there are the others, but they all fall into those five characters, more or less.

im not saying anything is wrong with these people. they are no more exciting or inviting than myself, but my selfish attitude, coupled with my misplaced hubris, longs for some more motivation than just LEARNING to go to school. i just want someone to kinda fantasize about during the lulls. a face to look at when im bored. perhaps someone to make jokes with during our breaks. its not like im asking for romance. jesus christ who has the time for that? but it would be nice to feel like im not the only not-entirely-over-the-hill student in my classes. jeez, fucking gimme a break