Blue Pills [aka the time i almost got aids]

i was on the frayed edges of consciousness, lying in a makeshift bed on the floor of mikes bedroom. a blanket for a mattress, a sheet for a blanket, and the floor as a pillow. its was about 1am and the middle of a school week. i was 15 years old.

the phone rang and mike casually answered it. i tried to get comfortable and ignore him but he started getting these jolts of excitement in his tone and then he started hissing in my ear: dude! dude! wake up. its those two girls that came over earlier, they wanna pick us up and go to a motel room!

my sleepy mind scanned to earlier. i remember those two girls. two cute black chicks. one short and thick and one tall and skinny. both had pretty faces and nice, batting eyes. their names were Lanika and Tatiana. and if i remembered correctly, they had come over uninvited and unknown. they had some words with one of the girls that was already at our house and ended up doing something silly like pouring water all over her Honda Civic. come to think of it, we had kicked them out because of that.

now they were calling us at 1am and asking if we wanted to go to a motel room with them.

uh.. yeah. sure.

so they come by a half an hour later in a brand new Lexus and all we breeze to the Econo-lodge. seating arrangments assign me Lanika and we stumble through awkward conversation, trying to figure out who we each other is. we get to the hotel room and there's more meaningless chatter and then some meaningful pauses. eventually they ask if we know where to get some alcohol and thus, the night began.

they give us $50 and the keys to the Lexus. we grab the goods and leave without asking questions. we get in the car and rolling down van ness are quiet and marvel at the city before us. first we hit the club, circling the block blaring Bel Biv Devoe and giving eyes and giving nods looking away shyly and hey whats up yo whats your name and damn girl you are beautiful so fucking beautiful did you know that i swear you really are your gorgeous. and then we stop at a friends house and take a shot of tequila and brag about our fortune and our friend ask who they are and we giggle and say we dont know. then we head to the store where they wont card because they dont care and we cruise back to the hotel beaming under the street lamps glare.

we have sloppy adolescent sex and passout and only the boys came. we wake up at about noon and the girls say we can take the car to school, they have the room for a few days, just bring it back after. Lanika mutters she'll probably be asleep anyway and mike steals a few condoms before he shuts the door.

mike decides to "run some errands" and i get dropped off at school where i just wander the halls bragging to anyone i see, regardless of weather or not they listen, about my cinematic night and how you can still smell it on my clothes. then i go back to mikes after but he isnt there. a few hours pass and i begin to wonder where he is. did that fool go back to the hotel room without me? what the fuck, he better not have! thats just ... well thats just selfish! oh, and if he did go back there, he BEST NOT have brought no other fool! finally, his mother, who i see about as much as a bald eagle, burst into the room.

-mikes been arrested! they found him in a stolen car! what do you know about this?

right. i think i told her i didnt know. thats just a guess.

so it turns out that these two girls were actually named like, Sharon and Tracy or something [i knew there wasnt no Lanika's in Marin] and had just jumped into a running car on the way to school that morning and drove off. it was winter, i guess some fool was warming up his Lexus before he drove to work and got his shit jacked. so Sharon/Tatiana and Tracy/Lanika drive to the city and proceed to mug old ladies for money. get that? they mugged old ladies for money. then they ended up hitting the jackpot when they merked this old Russian for $800. hence the hotel room and alcohol loot.

a week or so passes and we get another phone call, this time at a reasonable hour. its Sharon, calling collect to apologize from the juvenile detention center. mike is chit chatting with her, laughing and still trying to figure out just who she is. then he holds the phone away from his mouth a bit and casually drops this bomb on me: oh dude, Lanika got AIDS. you should go get tested.

awesome.

next day we cut school to head down to the free clinic, mikes there for support, im there to find out if ive got the mothafuckin AIDS. the waiting room to this spot is an entirely different post, so ill just cut to the chase. i got checked for everything and came up clean, mike tested for everything and came out with a prescription of blue pills that would clear his shit up in about a week. we never heard from or saw Lanika/Tracy or Tatiana/Sharon again.

this post is longer than your mamas clit. and thats hella fucking long yo.