Friday, May 29, 2009

this festering

i have been meaning to update but havent and thats that.

now i will just post the little bits of crap ive scribbled in the past day or so. the broken throw-aways that make me up. this will be brief and lazy. like sex with me but without all the panting. thank you very much.

I am filled up with language but in it there are no stories. So at this point I’m writing just for the sake of it. As if there is a surplus of words that need to be on a page and I am just a dumb messenger.

I write academic essays in haste. I read and then forget what I read. I let myself unravel in the operatic nature of it all. I smoke a cigarette and only feed my addiction. I swamp myself in alcohol and only smell like it in the morning.


What else is there but life and death, except for everything in between?

I guess that question answers itself.


Someone is blaring classical music from their car and they are sitting right outside my house.

And earlier today a guy rolled by in a money green Saab and he was blasting jazz with the convertible top down.

things are looking up for old people.


She ask what it was that she said. She sent it to me on an email, so I should know exactly what it was she said.

I say I don’t have the email anymore. I say I put it in the trash.

Then I deleted it from the trash.

She says then how can you prove I said anything? How can you prove I meant what you think I said?

I say because I read it. I read the words you wrote. And they left imprints on me and I remember and always will and these impressions wont go away. So I know. I know. I don’t need the emails to back my memories up. I know.

I deleted the emails.

There is no need to burden myself with facts. They don’t prove anything anyway.

She pulled the blankets up and I shut the door.


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:gray matters: by jkg is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
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