Monday, February 28, 2005

Be Gentle: A Five Part Essay

yo no seré fisted en el asno!

you know, i really do like the IDEA of school. and the obligation to physically attend class isnt TOO much of a burden. but the doing school work at home part sorta fist ass. no really, its like having to come home every single night and having a fist punching into your tender anus repeatedly until you can perform no other function but watching tivoed episodes of Chappelle's Show while lying ass up on the couch.

often i am asked, "jon, dont you feel great that you are back in school?" and of course, i do appreciate and enjoy the challenge of learning and must also admit that i have selfish reasons for suddenly galvanizing my academic career back into action [the genuine desire to get smarter and the more obvious motive: barely legal teens], but i cant always say it was the 'best' decision i've made. and no, it doesnt make me feel great all the time. so you want to know if going back to school feels great? well sure, if feeling great means having someone elbow deep inside your rectum.

now, i realize that some rather respectful citizens truly DO enjoy having a fist plunging deep into their anus over and over again. so let me say i mean no disrespect when i equate doing homework with something i find as a violent display of unhealthy sexual activity, and something they find kinda tingly. i mean hell, i aint gonna lie, i've fisted a chick. not in the ass, but you know... it was all five fingers and a lil bit of forearm, still... i wouldnt want it done to me. and thats my point: to ME, being fisted in the ass aint cool. to some one else, sure. whatever, bend over and spread your cheeks, i'll be Muhammad Ali and your anus can be Sonny Liston. but im not really into it. its kinda like homework to me.

like, i got a bag of trees right? they is ripe for the burning. but i also gotta write some marxist shit and revise some freudian shit and write some fictional 'ultimatum' shit. pfft. all this shit gotta be done by wednesday night cuz im leaving friday morning. on a jet plane back to cali for a warm week in the west. so i have to GET ON IT right? but see? see? i got these trees! they green and they waitin! they wantin! they need to burn!!! but shit i cant be pipe bombing my brain before i bust the words out. i didnt pay for this shit to get average grades.


queme la quemadura de bebé!

thats where im stuck. im stuck. im stuck. i started it. i gotta finish. ive committed to the project. if nothing else, i gotta get through this semester. ive got to forego all the parties. all the open bars. ive gotta give up on the curves for a bit. the hookers. the seedy mornings with cracked lips and bad breath and one thing on your mind. i gotta say "no." this has to be done for a few more months, and more importantly, for the next few nights. i have to close the deal. sort it out. handle my shit, for the next few days.

and it kinda sucks. but i still try to get into the ol blog when i can. i wont forget about you, black space, neon words, random image on the internet. see, i was finished earlier, i was on the couch, ass up, watching the tube, but i came in here and i thought, if im not going to write anything for school, im gonna write nothing at all to my imaginary readers. and i figured it was worth it. i figured it was cool. i figured, if im writing, im writing. guess ill just have to bend over and take it.


agáchese y tómele ramera!!

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:gray matters: by jkg is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.
Based on a work at downtownalleys.blogspot.com.